Tag: high horse

More Sayings From My Mother

fronie-bowers-jones1[1]The other day I realized I had violated my in-home safety policy. I never even thought about such things until my friend Renny ran downstairs in her sock feet, slipped on the carpeted stairs, and shattered her ankle so badly that it subsequently took pins and plates to put it back together. Then there was the incident when my poor brother fell off the bed while changing a lightbulb in a ceiling fixture, hung his foot in the box spring, and was stranded for two days with a broken leg before he could get help.

Now that I’ve thoroughly frightened everyone, I should explain that the in-home safety policy applies only to people who live alone or perhaps spend all day or all night alone at home. Number one rule: Don’t run around in socks. Either go barefoot or wear shoes that fit. Rule number two: Always have your cellphone in your pocket. Make sure it’s charged. Rule number three: Teach your cat to dial 911 (joke.)

Anyway, my violation did not result in an injury, but I realized I’d done it while staring at a sink full of dirty dishes. Immediately one of Mother’s immortal sayings popped into my head: “If I get sick in the night, don’t call the ambulance until you clean up this kitchen.”

Another favorite behavior was how she hoarded her nice nightgowns and robes in case she had to go to the hospital. I guess she was concerned about looking well-dressed in her hospital bed.

Then I smelled my garbage, realizing it needed to be carried out, and thought, “There’s something kyarny in there.” That was a favorite word of Mother’s. I just found it online in the Urban Dictionary. I knew it meant “smells like something dead.” According to that website, kyarn is a Southern derivative of the word “carrion,” meaning dead or decaying flesh.

Another of Mother’s expressions was often aimed at me: “Get off your high horse.” That meant, “Stop being so arrogant and superior,” or as phrases.org.uk says, “A request to stop behaving in a haughty and self-righteous manner.”

Well, I have to get off my high horse and go get my cellphone. That way if I should get drunk as Cootie’s goose (i.e., dizzy) I can always call for help!

High-Hat and Other Expressions

My family has been in Tennessee since shortly after the Revolutionary War, when one of the Bowers ancestors got a land grant.  That branch of the family came from England long before that.  Sometimes I have wondered if some of the characteristic expressions that Mother, Daddy and various of my aunts and uncles used go back that far.

Most of them were vivid, descriptive and not anything my friends from other places (like Pennsylvania, for example) had ever heard.  Mother used to complain that someone “high-hatted” her, which meant to act in a snobbish or condescending fashion, i.e., this person thought she was better than Mother.  There was no greater offense to Mother than to be looked down upon!  It looks like the term is derived from a “high hat” like a beaver or a topper which a snobbish person might wear.

Another one was to “be on your high horse.”  This means “to be disdainful or conceited,”  according to the American Heritage Dictionary.  Used in a sentence:  “Don’t you get on your high horse with me, young lady” (usually addressed to me).  This expression goes back to late Middle English, according to the online dictionary!  1375 – 1425, to be precise.  Who’d a thought?

My favorite, however, is “poor dog wouldn’t wag his own tail.”    This one is complicated.  It means, someone who is boastful or bragging, or it can mean someone who is too proud to speak of their own accomplishments.  The irony and understatement make me laugh.  When I looked it up, there’s another expression I had never heard:  “It’s a sorry dog that won’t wag his own tail.”  Apparently this one is from Georgia, and means self-promotion is ok.  The quote was from a judge in Atlanta.

Finally, the best one from Uncle Floyd, who was a font of old sayings:  “Drunker than Cootie’s goose.”  “Drunk” means dizzy or giddy in this old saying.  But who on earth was Cootie, and why did he have a goose?  This may be derived from “Drunker than Cooter Brown,” who apparently decided to stay drunk for the duration of the Civil War (not a bad strategy in my opinion). http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cooter_Brown

Anybody else have a strange or funny saying from your family?